I watched as my husband succumbed to cancer
It was as if she had known each one of us for a while. From time to time, she would ask us individual questions on career, family and life in general.
She also shared about some of the activities she is involved in and encouraged the team to be part of them.
She is an economist by profession but says she has for the past 16 years been an advocate for women because of their disadvantaged position in society. This includes women in agriculture, business, policy level and governance.
One of the activities Kasule personally requested me to get involved in was to continuously use media platform to sensitise the masses on the fight against cancer.
“Use your podium to take up the initiative to fight this expensive and silent killer disease,” Kasule tells me.
As I was to find out shortly when she shared her life story, the fight against cancer is personal for Kasule whose husband Mathew Kasule, succumbed to colon cancer in May 2015.
His cancer started as a pimple on the back
The first sign which surfaced in 2007 came as a pimple in the back just above the bum, where the spinal cord ends. Since it did not appear harmful, Kasule scratched it.
“A friend of ours who is a medical personnel prescribed him a few tablets and creams,” Kasule says.
The pimple disappeared only for another to surface in 2009 just next to where the first one had appeared. Once again, Kasule applied the prescribed cream and swallowed the tablets.
Although the second pimple healed too, it took a little longer to respond to the medication this time round.
In 2011, another pimple surfaced in the exact area where the first one had appeared, this time bigger and with pus. “This worried and forced us to visit Nsambya hospital where the pus was extracted, and the wound dressed,” Kasule narrates. “It healed up a few days later but left a scar behind.”
In 2013, the couple got more puzzled when another pimple surfaced, burst and left a bigger wound. Then they started to wonder what was causing the pimples. Once again, the wound was attended to at Nsambya hospital. It did not, however, heal as fast as the previous ones.
Around May 2014, Kasule started complaining of constipation, which persisted even after a diet change. A scan showed everything was normal but an examination of the anus revealed a tumor. Because it was suspected to be the cause for his difficult bowel movement, it was suggested that it be removed.
The operation took place the following day from 2pm to about 5.30pm where samples were also taken for a biopsy (an examination of tissue taken to find out the cause of a disease). “When he was dressing up after we were discharged, I remember getting shocked upon seeing two swellings that had suddenly surfaced in the areas where the pimples had been. They looked like chicken eggs but I did not mention anything to him,” recounts Kasule.
The doctor called sooner than expected and insisted the late Kasule goes to see him for the biopsy results. “We went to see him and that was when we received the shocking news that my husband had Stage Two colon cancer. He was devastated but I remained strong because I had faith that it could be stopped from spreading.”
Kasule, who was still strong enough to work, was not in a rush to start the cancer treatment at cancer institute as referred by the doctor at Nsambya hospital. An economist too, he reasoned there was still a lot to be done and the treatment would only make him weak. Around that time, one of the egg-like swellings burst leaving a wound that was oozing pus. “Then, I insisted it was time to go to the Cancer Institute and start the treatment,” Kasule says recalls.
Nightmare at the cancer institute
Around September 2014, the couple made their way to the the old cancer building at Mulago hospital. “I was in utter shock upon arrival.
There were so many people queueing for treatment. Everyone looked sick and miserable,” she says.
Her husband had to wait sleeping on the verandah and when he was admitted, he had to sleep on the floor waiting for a free bed to be available. “We had to do some tests and buy some drugs elsewhere, which turned out to be expensive. Just one tablet could cost Shs30,000 and yet we’d need about seven of them in a week,” Mrs Kasule narrates.
Away from the drugs, we were also spending a lot of money on disinfectants. At some point, a bar of washing soap really meant a lot to Kasule who was husband’s care taker. She spent a month at the institute where he even underwent radiotherapy (use of high-energy x-rays to destroy cancer cells in the area that is affected).
“Remember that radiotherapy machine at the cancer institute which the media largely reported after it broke down? That was the one my husband was also treated with but that was before it shut down completely,” Kasule says.
“I was not even surprised when the information eventually surfaced that it was no longer working. That machine operated on a 24 hour basis to the extent that some people would sleep next to it waiting for their turn of treatment.”
After getting the needed treatment, Kasule was released from the institute back home. He decided to go and stay in the village for some time.
The cancer spreads
Upon his return, his wife noticed he had lost mobility. Concerned, she accompanied him back to the institute. An X-ray was done and the results showed that the cancer had spread up to the spinal cord. This was now around March 2015.
Upon inquiring what could be done to save his life, Mrs Kasule was devastated after she was told that as much as it was possible to re-admit him, the only challenge was there was no other drug they could use to treat him. The least that could be done is giving him pain killers.
The priority now was the family giving him the utmost love and care.
“I went back home and did as instructed nursing him day and night. His body parts started dying slowly and it even reached a time he could not turn himself, therefore making him develop bed sores,” Mrs. Kasule says.
At some point, she resigned from work in order to focus on taking care of her husband. “My world went upside down. I was stressed and traumatised by the whole experience. I had never seen anything like this. I lost weight,” she says, adding, “Despite this, I did everything in my power to take care of my husband and I know that he appreciated.”
Kasule passed away on May 10, 2015 with his wife by his side.
Coping after his death
Kasule is a believer in God whom she says created this road map for her having also lost a beautiful eight-year-old daughter in 2002.
“I believe it is only God who has supported me throughout this journey. When this cancer case came about, we were all terrified, especially my children who were witnessing a second death in the family. I prepared them and God made us even stronger than before. I have a strong Catholic background and it is this faith that has been a tool and weapon of inspiration in my life, before during and after the incidents.” The tireless support from her children and other family members, friends, workmates, the church community as well as neighbours strengthen and gave her hope to continue on with life.
Today, Kasule has joined the team that advocates for cancer screening and treatment. This year, she fundraised for some funds and went back to the cancer institute with Easter gifts for the children’s ward.
How it changed me
“The whole experience was a turning point in my life,” she reveals, “The first challenge was accepting a total new life change. When everybody left us after the funeral, I remained alone with my children in the house and we had to sit and forge a new life all together, that is, how to sustain their education while meeting our basic needs amid other issues.”
Cheering up Florence Kasule
makeover. The nomination that vouched for Florence Kasule’s makeover reasoned that it would help refresh and cheer her up. Kasule has lost a daughter and her mother. Her husband succumbed to colon cancer last year, a story she accepted to share in the hope that another woman out there going through a similar experience might find some encourage or comfort.
First, Kausle shares her makeover experience;
“I remember getting a call a few months ago informing me about a makeover.
As much as you explained what it was all about, I failed to really understand why I had to be part of it. Your persistence with frequent follow-up phone calls finally made me give in to the idea.
But also, when I discussed the idea with my children, they encouraged me to take part. Well, eventually we did meet up for the makeover session which also gave me the opportunity to try on different dresses. I felt that some of the outfits did make me look 20 years younger. I was reminded of the 1990s.
The makeup also made me look youthful. It reminded me of my wedding day many years back. I liked what I saw in the mirror.
I only wished my children had been present to see my transformation. Other than that, the makeover was a good experience. It made me laugh.
Just as I returned home that evening after the makeover, something came to my mind. I thought some people would misinterpret the message of this whole experience wondering what I wanted in the papers. I was even tempted to call to stop you from publishing the photographs.
But you explained that makeovers are transformations you do for nominees whose names are sent to Full Woman, I was able to calm down. Unfortunately, I have asked around and still can’t find out which of my friends called Juliet nominated me.”
Life lessons
“My feeling now is that life on earth is merely a journey. It is like being on stage in a play that has a beginning and an end. Plan how best to play your part as you prepare for your exit. I have learnt to agree that we come with nothing and we will leave with nothing. All we struggle to acquire is vanity.
Have the basic needs of life, be happy with others, be supportive but more importantly learn to forgive and strengthen our love for God who made our earthly road map, and knows when and how we shall leave this world.“
Kasule’s coping
There were ways I coped with the ordeal that I would like to share;
• At the time my husband was sick, I forgave him of every wrong he had ever done to me. Our marriage just like any other had gone through hills and valleys. If I had kept a grudge at heart, it would have added more stress to me.
• I also made sure that he died in Christ. I would bring priests to counsel and pray for him. I am happy knowing that his soul was brought nearer to God.
• I counselled our three children aged 25, 21 and 17 years and the four other children under my care. In the end, this brought more unity in the family.
• I got to know what friendship means when this ordeal befell my family. There is no need for having an enemy.
• I discovered that it was not my strength but God’s power that was pushing me through the ordeal. I became a very strong believer after the experience, especially also because I had earlier lost a daughter in 2002 and recently buried my mother who died at the age of 95 years.
Shopping guide
• Green dress: Shs400,000
• Casual outfit with pants:
ShsShs280,000
• Black dress with lace:
Shs450,000
• Suit: Shs250,000
Accessories:
• Bangles: Shs30,000
• Ear rings: Shs35,000
• Red shoes: Shs450,000
THE CREW
• Uzuri Fashion House
• Paramour Cosmestics Limited
The nomination
Dear Editor,
I would like to nominate a friend who I believe deserves this offer. Her name is Madam Florence Kasule. She is a mother of six and recently lost her husband to cancer and as if that was not bad enough, she also lost her mother around the same time.
She is a very responsible mother, a church counsellor and leader for women in Kiwatule Catholic Church. She has mentored a lot of people and given advise to a lot of struggling married couples, which I believe has saved many couples from getting divorced. This lady of late has been so depressed over the loss of her loved ones and I believe the makeover will go a long away in refreshing her mind and cheering her up so that she can move forward despite the pain, and continue with the good work she does for the community.
Regards,
Juliet
