Men and socks
If by design we were supposed to wear only one sock we would not have this problem. COURTESY PHOTO
What you need to know:
- You see, different men have different reasons for losing their socks.
- Some men do not even lose their socks. These are super organised chaps that have their pens, stapler, document files, coffee mug and the framed photo of their girlfriend organised in determinate columns at their workstation.
- Other men are free spirited, and jump from various things on their to-do list spontaneously. This kind will desperately look for their car keys yet they are holding them. Give this man a set of new socks and after a month, he will only have a different sock for each foot.
“Why do men lose their socks?” a female friend asked me last week. This question sounded accusative. Like we as men organise a meeting every fortnight and agree on a ten-point-plan on how to lose our socks.
You see, different men have different reasons for losing their socks. Some men do not even lose their socks. These are super organised chaps that have their pens, stapler, document files, coffee mug and the framed photo of their girlfriend organised in determinate columns at their workstation. Other men are free spirited, and jump from various things on their to-do list spontaneously. This kind will desperately look for their car keys yet they are holding them. Give this man a set of new socks and after a month, he will only have a different sock for each foot.
Socks also disappear because some men take them off hurriedly as they scurry off to do something important such as watch TV. The programme on the TV determines the seriousness of the loss. If he is rushing to watch the World Cup, he may take the socks off in the car and dash into the house to watch the game. If he is rushing to watch the 9 O’clock news he may take them off in the corridor.
Another reason is that men have multiple uses for socks. A sock once rolled, instantly becomes a ball that a man will use to practice his basketball shooting skills. This ball is aimed at everything that resembles a basketball hoop. This includes open windows, clothes washbaskets, trashcans, and chimneys. Another use a man may have for socks is making a rope for junior to skip. If junior wails for a skipping rope in the middle of the night, the practical father will find a way.
He will assemble his entire collection of socks and tie them end-to-end. Soon junior will be skipping away happily and peace will be restored in the home. Keeping track of the skipping rope after junior is done with it is a story for another day.
Many men also have trouble tracking things that come in pairs. If by design we were supposed to wear only one sock we would not have this problem. We would only have one sock to keep tabs on. Now if a man has seven pairs of socks for the week that makes them 14 socks to manage each week. Do you know how complicated that is?
