What if my girl has a male best friend?

What you need to know:

  • Heart to heart. Sometimes long time best friends could end up tying the knot, or even date and a fall out. Others stay friends for life. However, there is a debate as men weigh in on what they would feel if their girlfriend or partner had a male best friend

Criven Gecrizavio
I would allow her but I would not be comfortable
I have many female friends and the things they talk  about their boyfriends. I would not want  my girl to tell next man. The interactions with my peers also does not give me stamina to let my girl have a male best friend because most of them probably shot their shot but did not succeed. So they stay in her life as friends waiting for that moment, that day, when a crack emerges and they get their time.

Criven Gecrizavio

Sometimes the female friend may not know this but , it is the truth.
So would I allow her to have a best friend? Absolutely. Will I be comfortable with it? Absolutely not. A slight quarrel in our relationship will lead her straight to the  best  friend, which will not result in  good news for me.

Dr. Innocent Byegarazo
I know how the story usually ends
Jealous; it is not just about feeling a little envious when your partner spends time with another guy. It is about the sneaky suspicion that this dude might just be more than a friend. I have seen it happen – innocent friendships turning into something more. Call it experience or call it intuition, but when your girl’s bestfriend starts acting more like a boyfriend, well, it is a cause for concern.

Dr. Innocent Byegarazo

Communication? Sure, it is essential. But let us cut the rom-com dialogue. I have had my fair share of heart-to-hearts, and my concerns are as legit as they come.

Now, let us talk about the friendship battlefield. It is not just about setting boundaries; it is about the blurred lines that come with having a male best friend. Trust me, I have been there, done that. I have seen friendships evolve into something way more complicated – such as trusting her best friend more than me or worse, ending up like a co-husband in some twisted sitcom plot.

And let us not forget the big picture – marriage. It might sound extreme, but I have seen friendships escalate to the point where they end up tying the knot. Call me paranoid, but when your girl is spending more time with her best friend than with you, it is hard not to imagine them walking down the aisle someday.

So, it is not just about jealousy or communication. It is about the very real possibility of crossing boundaries and ending up in a situation that feels more like a sitcom plot than real life. I am not saying man best friends are always trouble, but from where I am standing, it is a slippery slope. 

Schuchi Karkera

Schuchi Karkera
I would have to play detective
I would be cool if the man  was not interested in my woman the romantic way.
Anyway, a relationship is based off trust and communication is key. If she has told me this from the start without me finding out, then that is okay. Still, her actions with the man should not raise red flags and she should not be clingy on the man, or give him more than 40 percent of her time compared to the time she gives me. That is the only way to keep jealousy and insecurity from creeping in our relationship. Clear boundaries must be drawn between her and male friend.

Being the investigator I am, I would befriend the man in order to know his intentions and find out whether he is up to snatching my girl, or is in a happy relationship. I would also quiz her on what she thinks of the man.

Jacob Jackson Mulera
I should be my girl’s bestfriend
I do not think my girlfriend’s best friend is supposed to be any other person other than me, her boyfriend. Others should be  just friends. I am talking about a real girlfriend to fiancée before becoming a  wife. Relationships have stages of  love. You have to go through all those stages through which you get to learn your partner and they learn things about you too. My girlfriend, therefore, has to be my best friend because no one knows a person like their best friend who has seen and learned them for some time.

Jacob Jackson Mulera

 If I let my fiancé have a male best friend, it means that I am giving another man room to Learn my own person and letting her heart fall for new feelings and attachments. So, my girlfriend should be a best friend to only his boyfriend; others are casual friends who should come and go.

Tom Ogalo
Trust and clear boundaries are key
When it comes to my girlfriend’s close relationship with a guy friend, I have always taken a pretty liberal stance. I believe trust and clear boundaries are key in any relationship, regardless of gender dynamics. As long as my girlfriend and her best friend maintain open communication and respect each other’s boundaries, I am not inclined to worry.

Tom Ogalo

However, it is important that I acknowledge that her best friend likely played a significant role even before I entered the picture. He might have been there, offering insights and opinions, perhaps even evaluating me from his perspective. It is a dynamic that I have come to accept as part of their friendship, as long as it does not interfere with the trust and respect we have built in our relationship.
As a matter of fact, I also have a female best friend.

Isaac Ayebare

Isaac Ayebare
That sounds like a problem
If my girlfriend’s best friend is  male, then there is a problem.
Do you know what best friends do? We run to them in case of anything. We are actually more comfortable disclosing certain things to them than we do with our lovers.
That means anything beyond friendship is possible.  I would not be comfortable with that.