How effectively do you communicate with children?
Min Atek
What you need to know:
- Months later, I engaged the mother too. I did not mention anything the daughter had said, but the mother soon shared her views about her daughter. It was a sad tale embodied with a breakdown in communication.
The message came by a voice note. In there, the eldest daughter went on and on to complain against her mother. At the end of the note, she begged me not to tell her mother anything about our conversation.
Months later, I engaged the mother too. I did not mention anything the daughter had said, but the mother soon shared her views about her daughter. It was a sad tale embodied with a breakdown in communication.
If there is anything that usually causes problems in relationships of any kind, it is the ability to communicate or the lack of it. Recently, one of my children wrote me a note on their way out of the house and back to boarding school. They often write me notes when asking for favours or something nice, which they slip under my door or in strategic places where I am bound to notice them.
This particular time, this child was expressing their frustration at me concerning a decision I had made which they thought was grossly unfair to them. I read the long note with mixed emotions.
On one hand, I was pleased that my child is able to freely communicate with me about a matter close to his heart. He broke down his points and this gave me a good idea of what he felt about a couple of things.
Growing up, we were not allowed to communicate freely with our parents. The note also allowed the child vent rather than to hold their emotions inside which, is not detrimental to their health.
On the other hand, I saw just how selfish they were because they were only seeing matters from their angle. By their note, I was informed on how to think, prepare and pray about our prevailing circumstances.
The ability to put across a message and to be understood is an essential skill that we all should master and enhance. I believe firmly that as children grow older, they should be trained to be keen and excellent communicators be it for the good or not so good things.
Trouble develops and escalates when there is minimal or no communication. Assumptions take centre stage and therein many unfortunate events brew, which perhaps would have been prevented. I often ask myself, am I communicating? Have I communicated well? Have I been understood? Should I have communicated differently?
DON'T MISS: Make the most with children while it lasts
Life is a continuous function and we must purpose to learn and improve at every possible opportunity. How well do you communicate or receive communication, particularly from your children?
