Master the art of mental adaptability in hard situations

Mental adaptability is not about being positive all the time or pretending to be okay.  It’s about learning to be okay regardless of what is happening. Life has many changes and challenges that create uncertainties.  Some life experiences are contrary to our expectations and obviously make us feel awful, disappointed and create pain. 

The loss of my sister to bone marrow cancer in 2017 was one of the toughest seasons of my life.  Fear gripped us all in the family. Here we were left with her beautiful kids crestfallen.  The truth is it was extremely painful and heartbreaking for me. My emotions and general well being changed forever.  I pondered on whether to choose to be miserable about it or adapt and pick all the broken pieces and extract lessons out of my situation.

To mentally adapt is learning to be okay in life and loving your life when things are not going your way and when things are getting tough.   Means shunning mental rigidity at all costs.  You change perspective and count your blessings in tough situations.  You make the right decision to put yourself in a good position mentally and in life given the current circumstances and the things that are not falling in place.  I recall deciding to love my late sister’s children the same way I loved her.  I shifted my deep love to the kids and took them in my home as my own to date.

The art of mental adaptability is making a choice to react positively to situations that seem tough. Naturally, a change in horizon or in expectations affect our lives so much.  We must shun the negative feelings, accept change and choose to feel better regardless of circumstances.

Endeavour to meet new people, talk to true friends, choose to adapt and embrace better things.  We grow from learning from other people’s coping mechanisms; connections to positive people and partake of their positive energy to navigate the season.

Well, change is scary not just because of the unknown, but sometimes experience has taught that change is usually bad.  However, not all change is bad, most times change makes the best version of us.   Sometimes life forces you to make a change because staying in your current situation becomes more stressful than the change. Mental adaptability is making the wisdom to make right changes that count, the right changes for you.  You take on the favourable options that make you better.

How do I adapt?  Notice your feelings and pay attention to your feelings.  Adjust and adapt your thoughts and behaviors and be able to positively think better to decide on how best to navigate the times.

Deepen your relationship with God in tough seasons, he cares for us. Try new things, sing, dance, play sports to divert your mind from current occurrences. Things come and things go. Sometimes quality time with a friend makes life seem better.  Hearing other perspectives to a situation is best.  This gives clarity of mind.

This means positively adapting to negative people, naysayers and haters in the journey of life.  Means choosing to disregard their negative energy and believing in who you are and who God is going to turn you into. Being emotionally distressed by what people say about you is not worth it. Simply adapt to the fact that not everyone in life will like you. 

Ms Joyce Nalunga Birimumaaso is a Senior Advocate and Member, Leadership Code Tribunal