50 years in marriage and still counting

When and how did you first meet?
Evelyne: We first met on December 28, 1969 during a party at home. George sent his friend to ask me for a date at Kamuganguzi playground in Kabale.
I obliged and the next day we met. He asked for my hand in marriage. Since I had completed school I asked him to come home and tell my parents about his intentions.
George: I always saw her and admired her but I was shy and she was young and still in school.
I later learnt that she had completed school, so I asked my friend to escort me to her home. And we got talking.

What attracted you to each other?
George: I had spent a while looking for a wife. I liked Evelyne because she is hardworking, I would see her going to dig, and I told myself that she was the type of woman I wanted.
Evelyne: I liked him because we were almost of the same physique. He was working in Kilembe Mines in Kasese, so I knew he had money too.

What happened after?
Evelyne: He talked to my parents and they asked him for dowry. It took him 10 months to pay. He came in September 1970 saying he wanted us to wed.
George: I was not from a well-off family but I had some savings. I bought two goats and six bunches of matooke. My mother contributed a sack of sorghum and that was all for the wedding. We did not draw budgets or call for meetings.

What makes it different from today?
Evelyne: In our time, parents and their children would plan for the party without holding meetings like we do today.
It would be up to the groom’s mother to tell a few friends and ask them for some help where need be.

Did you do the same for your anniversary?
Evelyne: No, our children and their friends paid for everything. We only contributed 170kg of sorghum, a sack of sweet potatoes and two sacks of Irish potatoes.

Did you look out for any specific attire on your wedding?
George: I did not buy a new attire. I had one suit which I had bought from Kilembe. I wore it for the introduction ceremony and for the wedding.
Evelyne: I wore a cotton dress to my wedding. Any cloth made from cotton was in vogue. I got the material from our shop in town and took it for tailoring.

What was the most expensive item?
Evelyne: The most expensive thing at this celebration was food, we spent Shs17m.

Did you go for premarital counselling?
George: Yes, we had to but I only attended one session because I was always away at work. Our church priest on the morning of our wedding held one session, I learnt to respect my wife and to make sure my communication with her is good.
Evelyne: I attended it with my brother-in-law because my husband was away. I learnt to be submissive, listening and care for my family.
What is your best memory?
Evelyne: When we visited his family with some of my relatives and we were not given breakfast. To date, we always laugh about it. I always ask him why they could not even give us a cup of water!

Was honeymoon vital?
Evelyne: No, there was no honeymoon in our days. After the wedding, the bride would stay indoors at her husband’s house. In case you wanted to go out, you would veil yourself and make sure you do not get in contact with your father-in-law.

What lessons have you learnt from your marriage?
George: When you are patient you win. I did not know I would reach this far. I felt like a champion when I saw the turnout at our anniversary.
Evelyne: Love and patience have been our greatest lessons in this journey.

Have you celebrated your other anniversaries together?
Evelyne: No, this was our first anniversary.

Any new thing about your spouse?
George: No. When I married her, she was hard working and strong. We worked together and built a home. She is still the same and doubles the love every day.

What do you think causes short term marriages today?
George: Greed; some wives want to have what others have yet they know their husbands cannot afford. This brings misunderstandings and sometimes leads to divorce.
Evelyne: Some women do not want to work. Or the man has money but he does not share with his wife yet he expects her to buy necessities.

What is your advice to those planning to wed?
Evelyne: Be loving and hardworking and at least save before asking friends to contribute.

If you could do anything different, what could it be?
George: Nothing.
Evelyne: Whatever was not done on our wedding was done on our anniversary. We had no cake on our wedding day.

What quality has worked wonders?
George: Love. I was sick for a year and she took good care of me without complaining or giving up. She is so helpful, whenever she is going to the field or to do some work, she ensures I have something to eat and returns quickly to prepare for me supper.

HIGHLIGHTS
Date: October 10, 1970
Anniversary: August 25, 2018
Groom: George Bazirake
Bride: Evelyne Nshemereirwe
Church: Kamugangunzi CoU
Reception: Nyacyoga village, Kabale District.
Guests: 1,000
Budget: Shs150m